Which story is better?
Tommy’s way out of it was the ultimate bluff. He knew he was going to get his ass kicked, or get killed. For us, getting knocked down is getting killed.
Tommy said to the guy in charge, “You know, you guys got me.There’s no two ways about it. Maybe I can hurt somebody, but I’ll tell you what. I’m going to bite your fucking nose off your fucking face. I’m taking your nose.”
And he bluffed his way right out of it.
The guy said, “Oh, wait a minute, man. That’s OK.”
“You talk about scary. It wasn’t the time for me to put people down. But that’s my act.”
“A drunk guy–really drunk–makes his way up though the audience . He’s yelling from the back as he’s walking up. And I’m saying stuff back to him, which is pissing him off. The audience is loving it. The stuff I’m saying is about the size of his dick, among other things. I’m playing to the audience, saying the things I think will insult him enough that he’ll go, ‘OK, you win.’ that’s really what they want, to be put in their place. “
The drunk approaches the stage and shouts, “I’M A MARINE! I’M A MARINE!”
“That’s the last thing I want. I’m not a Marine, but if I had had a gun at that moment, I would have taken it out and used it.”
The drunken Marine moves toward the comedian.
Suddenly a man in the audience rises.
“He was a little guy, and I mean a foot shorter than this guy. But he bars the way, stops this guy. I was amazed. And he stopped him without throwing a punch. It was David and Goliath. Unbelievable! The guy takes a swing at him, but this little guy just kind of ducked, and started propelling the drunk out of the room.”
Afterwards the comedian bought his defender a drink, gave him a hug, and praised him to the audience.
“They gave him a standing ovation, this little guy. He was a master sergeant, so he was probably just very clear that he could handle this situation. He handled it. I couldn’t believe it.”